Well I tried....

[Girlzmum]

Jess85, I took a leaf out of your book!

Yesterday my dh rang me to tell me that he'd just got an email from his friend, husband of the friend who I've fallen out with, to say they were expecting a baby. I decided to grab the bull by the horns and emailled him myself, I congratulated him, asked how his dw was feeling, how far along she is and when the baby is due. I also sent some pics of the girls ( they're madams godparents but haven't seen her since her 2nd birthday party) I didn't get any reply so I asked dh if he'd heard anything - he'd emailled dh with the answers to my q's and to thank him for the pics. :no:

I really didn't have any problem with him, his wife had a problem with me and started telling people that I said really horrible stuff to her both about her and the people she was talking to (all untrue) yet I'm getting treated like I don't exist over it :ac39:. Wish I could take the higher ground and shrug my shoulders but I'm really upset about it.

[Lemon]

I can understand you feeling really upset, especially as you were big enough and took the time to contact them with pictures and stuff. People like this you just don't need to waste your energy on in life, there are many others who would appreciate your friendship. Sorry you are upset, there's not alot you can do about it other than try to not be hard on yourself. x

[Netty]

You've tried your best - not much more you can do, I suppose?

[MrTempleDene]

I can understand you being upset about it, but you are bigger than this, they are the ones being petty!

Although if this guy believes the lies his partner said, then he probably is genuinley upset and thinks he's perfectly justified in ignoring you.

Can't you get DH to stick his oar in?

[Girlzmum]

It all happened a year ago, we realised that she has some serious problems (I wasn't the first person she'd done it to) but dh was really angry that her dh hadn't defended me at all (we'd been friends before they met, I even helped to get them together) I really didn't want them to fall out over it because, if she does have problems, the time will come when he needs a friend and I don't want him to think that we weren't there for him.

TBH I can understand him not saying anything at the time - he has to live with her. I just thought the time had come to try to get past it, I've been thinking about contacting them for a while and this seemed to be the best opportunity to do it.

[MrTempleDene]

Maybe his wife watches his e-mails and he can't reply directly to you?

[Girlzmum]

It was his work email (civil service) so no.

[twiglet333]

sounds like you have done your best and made the move.

[Ellie]

Col, I feel so bad as I feel caught in the middle of all this - I did not know until the other day that natalie was pregnant - the other person I ranted about was not her, was genuinely someone from church. I know what you mean because my husband, your husband and her husband were friends before all us girls came on the scene. I feel bad that they are not all close now but I guess things change. Please do not in any way blame yourself or feel bad about this - you are a great wife, mother and friend - you have always been there for me and drew (and many others) - I think maybe Nat has issues that she has yet to deal with (having had v recent experience of this - was not you! - has said some awful things about Chrisitine,as in m-i-law). You have tried - you are a very strong, wonderful lady who should feel proud for trying to mend bridges. With much love, El - ps have had great day so far, going out to tea with drew soon, miss the kids though!

[smirnoff]

love and hugs what an awful thing to happen to you xxx

[Girlzmum]

Don't worry El, I believe you!!!!! If you knew Nat was pg I know you would have told me! Don't feel caught in the middle, I told you at the time I was just glad someone had let me know what was happening and I really needed to take time out to resolve how I felt about the whole thing and let go of my anger that was why I didn't try until now.

TBH I'm delighted that Ad got in touch with Dave and told him himself, I'd have been heartbroken if he'd found out from someone else and I'm really happy that she's expecting, hopefully she can find some peace in her life. I'm just upset atm over how I've been treated but I know that I've tried.

[Ellie]

Big hugs to you - would be so nice if all the guys could get together - Drew would certainly insigate it - what about suggesting a poker night round at Paul's?

[Girlzmum]

LOL, I play poker better than Dave!!!! My mum taught us how to play using dolly mixtures on our washed out weekends in the caravan! But I'll definately say to him, wish he'd go out more tbh. I kept saying to him to get out when he was home and we were in England but he just went to his mums.

[Ellie]

Aw bless! - well Drew can certainly arrange it - would you like to meet up with Nat? - you could all come here some evening for drinks etc - is ok if you don't want to, understand why, just wanted to offer x

[bikemad]

Aaaaawwww Colette you tried your best-if the woman n bloke want to act so immature n childish then they have the problem not you.:yes:

[TopKat]

It all happened a year ago, we realised that she has some serious problems (I wasn't the first person she'd done it to) but dh was really angry that her dh hadn't defended me at all (we'd been friends before they met, I even helped to get them together) I really didn't want them to fall out over it because, if she does have problems, the time will come when he needs a friend and I don't want him to think that we weren't there for him.

TBH I can understand him not saying anything at the time - he has to live with her. I just thought the time had come to try to get past it, I've been thinking about contacting them for a while and this seemed to be the best opportunity to do it.

They'll either come round or they won't.

Some people stay angry for a while, then snap out of it. Some people however just stay being tossers no matter what, sounds to me more like she is the prob not him tho.

At least you tried. So you are the bigger person.

See what happens in time. They might need time to accept the olive branch or they might use it as a fire lighter..who knows how peoples minds work.

Wouldn't worry about it..I don't have any of my friends from years ago other than my hubby...and back then we didn't even like each other much!

[Girlzmum]

Aw bless! - well Drew can certainly arrange it - would you like to meet up with Nat? - you could all come here some evening for drinks etc - is ok if you don't want to, understand why, just wanted to offer x

I'd love to call over but not for Nat tbh, I'm fully prepared to be civil to her but I don't think I'll ever consider her to be a friend again, I did really think I was ready but the way he got on has just confirmed to me that I'm better off. Hope you understand my reasons for it.

[Ellie]

Of course I do - don't feel bad missus x ""cutey""b